Category Archives: Beating Breast Cancer

Follow my road from diagnosis & denial to recovery and remission.

I CAN’T COMPLAIN…

Hi everyone,

It’s been awhile, I know. Thank you for the check-ins and questions about how I’ve been doing this past year or so. It’s helpful to know you are all thinking of me and still in my corner sending your love and prayers.  I really do appreciate it.

There’s been a lot going on since I last wrote and lately I’ve been thinking about my response when someone asks how I’ve been doing ab wann kann man disney+ herunterladen.  I often answer with a catch all of “I can’t complain…” and leave it at that. Sometimes it’s the truth, but other times it’s just easier than getting into the little nuances and nitty gritty of life after breast cancer.

But I was talking to a friend a couple of weeks ago who also went through breast cancer treatment and it got me thinking about all the after effects some of us have to deal with and several I’m going through right now powerpoint background for free.

For example, the medication I’m taking every day to block estrogen has pushed me into early menopause and causes me to wake up in the middle of the night from night sweats.

Most days I have to put  a sweater or jacket on in the office because I’m freezing, then take it off less than two minutes later because I feel like my insides are on fire from a hot flash herunterladen. And the hot flashes are usually preceded by an awful feeling of anxiety, which is one way I know it’s coming.  This happens over and over and over again, all day long.

A few months ago I broke out in a massive, insanely itchy rash over my entire body and bounced around from allergist to dermatologist for four days on no sleep, only to conclude it’s “most likely” an allergic reaction to some part of my treatment meds, or my body reacting to the hormonal changes brought on by the daily pill Download songs from youtube as mp3. The rash came back a few more times before finally going away. I’m now trying to prevent a recurrence by taking Allegra every day as well as making sure I get enough UVB rays from a dermatologist phototherapy booth, or the sun.

I’m also taking daily Vitamin D and magnesium pills to offset the effects of the estrogen blocker, and making sure I eat before taking them because I learned the hard way they can cause horrible nausea if taken on an empty stomach bus games for free.

I spent a night at the hospital in NYC a few months ago because of radiating chest pain that woke me up in the middle of the night and went through all kinds of tests for two weeks because chemo and radiation can cause heart damage.
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My feet and ankles randomly started swelling a few months ago from my medication, so I have to get rid of my closet full of shoes that now don’t fit and go buy all new ones, including workout sneakers.

The medication also has caused me to have horrible aching feet and joints that get so stiff when I sit for awhile, when I get up I hobble around like I’m 96 for the first few minutes before they warm up herunterladen. This has drastically reduced my ability to exercise and workout the way I’m used to, and want to.

Every time a new ping or zing happens in my chest, or I think I feel a lump that is just scar tissue near one of the two incisions that I hadn’t felt yet, I panic and think it’s a recurrence.

I can’t remember some things that I’m certain weren’t a problem before chemo and “chemo brain” came into play. I live with post-its and pop-ups on my phone with reminders of things I need to do, then sometimes still forget to do them download whatsapp without google.

That’s just a bit of what’s been going on in my world since active treatment ended and daily maintenance to prevent a recurrence started.

But as my friend and I continued chatting about all of the above and more, I looked at her and said, “I just wish I could go back to the body I had three years ago, before all of this started.” To which she replied, “No you don’t, that body had cancer in it.”

And that, my friends, is why “I can’t complain.”

SOME NERVE…

Hi all,

Thanks for keeping in touch and reaching out to see how I’m doing. Most of you see my updates on Facebook and Twitter (@DebCote) and comment there, but some people who aren’t on social media were wondering what I’m up to since I’ve been quiet here.  So I figured it’s time for a quick update.

The good news is I feel ok most days and being off Tamoxifen has been amazing. I am no longer being woken up by awful charley horses in the middle of the night or jumping out of my seat at work to walk off a painfully clenched hamstring youtube mp3 for free.

As you saw in my last post, I’m now taking a new pill, anastrozole, which is a different estrogen blocker than Tamoxifen. Anastrozole is usually given to post-menopausal women to block estrogen, but since I’m pre-menopausal, I have to get a shot every month to shut down my ovaries.  You can read quickly about that enjoyable process here in my last blog post called WORTH A SHOT.

I won’t bore you with the biology and medical mumbo jumbo (super technical term there, I know) but spoiler alert ladies: once your ovaries shut down your body still produces estrogen skype kostenlos downloaden für android. So the anastrozole is helping to block that since my breast cancer was having a good old time feeding off the estrogen my body was producing. If you remember I was “triple positive” which means I was estrogen/progesterone/HER2 positive.  I did the year of antibody infusions to kick the HER2 to the curb, now I’m getting the monthly shot and taking this new pill which blocks an enzyme in my body that is involved in estrogen production, therefore blocking the estrogen any cancer cells would like to party with.

The new pill is definitely better than Tamoxifen…but…yes, here comes the BUT.  I feel like I’m 95 years old. The biggest side effect from anastrozole…aside from the hot flashes from being pushed into menopause…is the awful joint pain and bone aches steam workshop inhalte herunterladen. If I’m sitting for a bit and stand up, it takes a few minutes for everything to loosen up so I can walk without looking like I just willy-nilly tried to run the Boston Marathon. It’s mostly in my feet, ankles and knees. If I’m walking around for awhile, it’s less noticeable, but to say I’m hobbling around when I first get up is an understatement herunterladen. The easiest way to help you understand, is that it feels a lot like bad flu aches. But it never goes away.

Although it is really uncomfortable, I’m trying to push through and keep moving and exercising. I started running a bit since it’s been pretty nice out. I start off very slowly and eventually pick up a little speed. It’s a far cry from what I’m used to being able to do, but I’m squeezing in a little bit here and a little bit there to try to be as healthy as possible kann man bei amazon prime downloaden.

And since I was doing mostly running, I figured why not try a 5K!  I “ran” the Asbury Park 5K a few weeks ago. The race photographer caught a picture of me and if you didn’t know I was a participant in the race, you would think I was working Secret Service.

You be the judge:

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It was good to have a goal and finish it, no matter how I looked or felt, at least I accomplished it.

The only other thing that is really bugging me is that in the past few weeks, when I raise my left arm, my fingers get numb. Almost like I slept wrong on them or they “fell asleep.” When I put my arm down, it mostly goes away fs17 kostenlos herunterladen.

During my last follow-up with my oncologist she said since this was my surgery side, it is possible that scar tissue from the lymph node surgery is bothering a nerve.  Or it could be a nerve issue in my neck area that is completely unrelated. Either way, it’s most likely some nerve that is being aggravated and the only way to tell is to get a couple of MRI’s and then go from there.  Not sure what the fix is after we figure it out, but hopefully it’s not too invasive gratis ebooksen forum.

So this month I will be at Case Del Sloan a couple more times than usual and getting the MRI’s done to see if it’s from surgery, or just a random new development.

In the meantime, my apartment is still full of post it note reminders, since I think I have a little bit of chemo brain left over.  I’m doing things like locking myself out of the apartment, forgetting to water plants or leave a light on for Nick when I leave for work youtube video herunterladen apple.  Not sure if that is chemo brain remnants or something new from menopause, of which forgetfulness is definitely a symptom.

But as a friend who had his own bout with cancer years ago said, “There can be so much left-over from dealing with cancer…it’s hard to sort out.”

That’s for sure. Almost every day from diagnoses in December of 2015 until now, I wonder if every new thing is related to breast cancer or the treatment for it.  You can’t not think that, no matter how hard you try.

In short, breast cancer is obnoxious, life invading and really does have SOME NERVE

WORTH A SHOT…

Hey everyone, hope you’re all doing well!

Thank you for all the check-ins and “Hey, how’s it going” texts and emails. I really appreciate it.

Speaking of check-in, if your’e on Facebook you probably saw I checked into Casa Del Sloan last Friday.  A lot of you had questions because you thought I was done with treatment after my last anti-body infusion in March.

Like done, done.

But, unfortunately when you’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer, I don’t think you’re ever really done download youku. There’s usually a lot of follow-up appointments and almost everyone is on some form of pill for 5-10 years to help prevent a recurrence.  As most of you know, my breast cancer was what they call “triple positive” (estrogen, progesterone and HER2) and just to focus on the estrogen part of the equation, the cancer cells were feeding off of it and that was stimulating their growth.

So the available treatments post chemo for an estrogen positive patient is to take a daily estrogen blocker pill, or yank out your ovaries. No one wants to do that unless it’s absolutely necessary, so the only option left is to take a daily blocker.

There’s two kinds of estrogen blockers that are used. Tamoxifen is one of them and it’s given to women who are premenopausal. That would be moi capella. The other is called an aromatase inhibitor and is for older, postmenopausal women.

The aromatase inhibitor has a slightly higher success rate of preventing a recurrence, so sometimes oncologists will put their premenopausal patients on that.  But in order to do that, the patient has to get a shot every month to suppress their ovaries and stop them from producing estrogen, which pushes them into menopause. Otherwise the aromatase inhibitor won’t work.

There’s all kinds of facts and studies behind the two meds, so for you medical/science nerds, here’s your chance to geek out google chrom herunterladen deutsch. This is the difference between the two, per Dr. Google:

Aromatase inhibitors limit the amount of estrogen the body produces in postmenopausal women.  AI’s work by preventing the conversion of steroids made by the adrenal gland into estrogen.
In a woman who has gone through menopause, the adrenal gland is the largest source of estrogen. AI’s don’t work in women who are premenopausal because their ovaries make most of their estrogen.
Aromatase inhibitors work by blocking the enzyme aromatase, which turns the hormone androgen into estrogen in the body elster 2016 kostenlos. This means that if you use an AI, less estrogen is available to stimulate the growth of hormone-receptor-positive breast cancer cells.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz, I know.

Here’s Tamoxifen:

Tamoxifen belongs to a class of drugs called selective estrogen receptor modulators (SERMs), which work by blocking estrogen from binding to its receptors in the breast. Tamoxifen is an “anti-estrogen” and works by competing with estrogen to bind to estrogen receptors in breast cancer cells. By blocking estrogen in the breast, Tamoxifen helps slow the growth and reproduction of breast cancer cells.”

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Anyway, when we first started talking about which estrogen blocker I would be on, my oncologist gave me the pros and cons of Tamoxifen vs the aromatase inhibitor download youtube videos on handy iphone.  There are side effects with both and if you look them up, you’d almost rather take your chances and not take either of them. Tamoxifen was supposedly relatively easy on people and there would be no need for me to get an additional monthly shot to suppress my ovaries. With the aromatase inhibitor the menopausal symptoms they cause from shutting off your ovaries can be bad.

So because I had just gotten over chemo and radiation, had been hospitalized with an infection and had a bout of shingles both in the middle of chemo, my doctor felt like I had “been through enough” and didn’t want to push me into menopause and have me deal with those additional symptoms. So we went with Tamoxifen so I could get back to what she referred to as  “some kind of a normal life.”

Well if you’ve followed along, I introduced you to my newborn baby, “Tamoxifen Cote” shortly after I started it ashampoo kostenlos downloaden chip.  The side effects kept me up all night, almost every night. Massive hot flashes and night sweats and horrible muscle cramping. I was waking up drenched and jolting out of bed and walking off charley horses in my living room at all hours of the night. Sometimes at work I would just be sitting there and my hamstring would seize up and I’d have to randomly stand up and stretch or walk it off.

I started acupuncture to help with the hot flashes and night sweats. Sloan did a study on it (shocker) and found acupuncture works to prevent hot flashes. So now I go once a week for that. It doesn’t take them away entirely, but it definitely does help download wikipedia page.

For the muscle cramping, I started drinking tonic water and apple cider vinegar and eating bananas and everything else with potassium to stop the cramping. I was taking magnesium supplements and drinking more water. I tried getting massages but I wound up jumping off the table from cramping.  I took hot baths to relax my muscles, then slipped and fell and cracked a rib in two places. And not to digress, but whose bright idea was it to put the hardest materials in the wettest, soapiest, most slippery room of the house?

Anyway,  after almost ten months of this, by the time I got to my next follow-up appointment with my oncologist I had had it download all images from a website.  We went through the options again which were to remove my ovaries or switch to an aromatase inhibitor with the ovary suppressor shot. There really wasn’t a great need to remove my ovaries, they usually do that for women who test positive for the breast cancer gene and women who are at high risk for developing breast cancer that could turn into ovarian cancer. And even if I did remove them, I’d still need to take a daily aromatase inhibitor to block the estrogen coming from other parts of my body like my adrenal gland. So we went over the process to get me on the aromatase inhibitor and decided on that.

What it would entail is taking the daily pill, going to Sloan every month for a shot to suppress my ovaries and then an additional shot every six months that helps slow bone loss and increase bone strength arcor mail.  Unfortunately,  one of the side effects of the aromatase inhibitor is that it can cause osteoporosis and brittle bones which can lead to bone fractures down the line.  It’s a small price to pay for potentially saving your life I guess.

As soon as we decided on what route to take, I started right away on the aromatase inhibitor and the nurse came in to give me my first two shots. The bone health shot was in my right arm.

And now here’s the fun part my oncologist, I’m almost positive, intentionally left out of the equation. The ovarian suppressing shot is given in the gluteus maximus. Yes, it’s a shot in the ass. Every month. It didn’t hurt when I got them, but I will tell you the one in the behind is sore as hell for a few days later.  It feels like a cross between getting kicked in the butt cheek repeatedly for 17 hours straight, or maybe doing squats and lunges for 2 days and trying to walk like a normal person.

But even after being off Tamoxifen for a couple of months I can already notice a difference. I still have a little muscle cramping and the hot flashes are still there because of the ovary suppression and the daily pill, but thankfully it’s a lot better than it was before.

So that’s the long answer as to why I’m back checking into Sloan on some Fridays again.

Fingers crossed this is the right move and it does the trick to prevent a recurrence because I never want to go down that road of treatment again.

No one knows for sure if it will, but I’d say it’s definitely….worth a shot.

YOU…

Hi all!

I know, I know, it’s been awhile. Sorry about that…just seemed like more of the same was going on the past few months and not really too much to write about.

Until now.

Some of you are on Facebook so you probably saw the good news. On March 24th I had my final anti-body infusion at Sloan.  Yes, after 17 long months from the first mammogram to the last needle, I don’t have to go back and see my oncologist until June.

A couple of weeks after treatment I was finally able to take a vacation. It was nice to not have any doctors appointments to rush to before, in the middle, or after work and to just be able to relax and take a few deep, ocean air breaths netflix for laptop.

It also gave me time to reflect on this whole crazy year and a half. Now that I’m on the other side of it, I look back and think of all the things I had to go through in order to get to this point.  I also think about how I got to this point in relatively one piece.

And that brings me to all of you.

There is no way I could have gotten through what I went through, without you.

From the very beginning when I first started with my doctor’s appointments, you were there. When I announced I had been diagnosed with breast cancer, you were there herunterladen. When I was going in for surgery to remove the tumor and sick as a dog during chemo, you were there. For the 6 long weeks of daily radiation appointments and my first clear mammogram, you were there. For every bump in between, antibody infusion needle and when I finally finished active treatment, you were there.

I wish I could somehow repay each and every one of you who gave up your time, thoughts, love and energy in order for me to focus all of my own time and energy on just getting well. But for now, all I can say,  is thank you.

It is impossible to name everyone and go through all that was done, but here’s some of the things that made a huge difference during what was definitely the most difficult time of my life flower of life free download.

From beginning to end you kept me in your thoughts and prayers. You sent informative books on breast cancer, beautiful flowers, food baskets, candy and a plant with an inspirational card attached. You dropped off homemade cookies, had food delivered, sent ornaments and trinkets, delicious snacks, spiritual healing jewelry, an inspiring magnet, a Fitbit and countless Starbucks and Dunkin’s gift cards to keep me caffeinated while running from one appointment to the next. You sent a beautiful figurine, incredible home sewn blankets and hats, a gorgeous homemade quilt and baseball hats. You brought dinner, then stocked the freezer with your amazing homemade food windows 10 installation downloaden. You sent hand drawn get well cards from your kids, healing essential oils, a radiation protective bracelet, non-toxic deodorant, and activity books to help pass the time.

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You showed up in whatever way you could. You came for surgery and cooked a favorite dinner.  You came to my doctor’s appointments with me and asked questions I may have forgotten. You came to chemo with me. You came to chemo with me with half the grocery store packed in your bag. You sat in the hospital room with me into the wee hours of the night, not leaving until I told you to go the meaning of. You helped me pick out a wig. You ran errand after errand chasing different foods I felt I could get down at any given moment. You came to visit, and brought a cake along with gifts and your infectious laugh. You asked to come visit and even though I wasn’t up for company, you were there in spirit. You sent me memes and inspirational videos on Facebook, you commented on my posts, urging me to stay positive and keep going. You commented here, on this blog as you read the nitty gritty of what goes on for a breast cancer patient in the thick of it.  You urged me to keep on writing skype download chip kostenlos deutsch 64 bit.

You put me in contact with your family and friends who had gone through this fight themselves. You told me what to expect and how to get through different phases of treatment. You checked in, you shared pictures and stories of your own journey so I knew what not to do and could also see there was light at the end of the tunnel.  You sold your crafts and sent me a portion of the profits. You sent a Visa gift card. You handed me specialized radiation lotion that worked wonders sims 3 laptop. You asked about organizing a fundraiser for me, even though you had your own hands completely full at the time. You ordered sports t-shirts with my name on them, reminding me to call on my athletic days, to dig in and go the distance. You cried with me, and sometimes more than me.

You covered for me at work and never made me feel like my treatment was in the way of our crazy work schedule.  You never pressured me about taking off early or coming in late for doctor’s appointments. You understood when I needed to be out and adjusted to my limits when I came back eigene bilder von facebook herunterladen. You counted down the days between treatments with me. You shared your office with me so I could do my post surgery stretches and make personal calls. You gave me pep talks and had a pizza party for our show team when I was finally finished.

You offered to touch up my “toddler chic” hair for free, with a reminder that my plan to just let it come in the way it wants never works. You laughed when I told you that story, and then sat me down in your own chair in hair and makeup and shaped it up on the spot. You gave me hair products you felt would be helpful while my hair grows back.

I honestly could go on and on.

But the biggest thing I want you all to know is that although the main life or death fight against breast cancer is a physical one, the rest of it is mental and spiritual. And every single time I was feeling sick, beaten, or felt like throwing in the towel, one of you would come through in a way listed above and it would give me the spiritual and mental boost I needed to buck up and plow through. Sure, I went through the rigorous daily treatment, but know that you played a major part in my survival and I appreciate everything that you did for me.

I walked through it, but WE beat breast cancer.

As for what’s going on now, I am still taking Tamoxifen every day to block the estrogen since my breast cancer was estrogen positive. I’m having some side effects from it that are a little pesty, but in the scheme of things, they’re manageable. I have a follow-up appointment with my oncologist in June and she may switch me to another med. We’ll see.

But right now I’m just enjoying going about the day to day of living without having to go through active treatment, and I’m moving forward in my life with a newfound perspective and priorities.

And one reason I can do that again, is because of YOU.

 

WRAPPING UP…

Hi all,

Hope everyone is doing ok and having a happy holiday season! Thanks for all the check-ins, I really appreciate it.  Since I had a clear mammogram the end of October, a lot of you thought I was done with treatment and have asked what, if anything, is next.

The short answer is I’m still at it. I know, it feels like it’s never going to end, but I’m just taking it one day at a time until April when I will officially be done bixby. Because I was triple positive (estrogen, progesterone and HER2) I am now on a daily estrogen blocker (Tamoxifen) and still getting HER2 antibody infusions to block the HER2. I get these every 3 weeks. I started these while getting Taxol in April and the treatment goes for a full year.  I am expected to be on Tamoxifen for 10 years or until my oncologist switches it out for another drug 3d modelle zum herunterladen.

The antibody infusions take a few hours at Sloan when all is said and done and there’s a couple of side effects with it that can linger but it’s nothing compared to chemo.  Also, the 3 weeks in between infusions has given me time to get back to a semi-normal schedule with work and life.  And in such a busy time of the year, it’s nice to be able to go to a Christmas party, shop or spend my evenings wrapping up presents and relaxing and not commuting home from the upper east side of NYC download kodi voor mac.

But I am not only wrapping up presents, I’m also wrapping up a bunch of necessary doctor’s appointments I have had to push off because I spent a full year over at Casa del Sloan.

Prior to my diagnosis I was pretty vigilant about getting my annual exams, so once I had some time I needed to get back on track.  As I wrote a couple blogs ago, I went for the biggee, my follow-up yearly mammogram dropbox download zip file too large. Luckily it came back clear, so that was  relief. Mammogram, check!

And because chemo sidelines your immune system, I wasn’t able to get my teeth cleaned. I went right before I started chemo in February and was finally cleared to get them done again. Dentist, check!

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Then I had to do the annual gyno. Sorry guys this part’s not for you, but ladies, you know the deal. I totally wanted to skip this, but it had been a year and one of the big concerns when someone has breast cancer is that they can also develop ovarian cancer.  The doctor said everything appeared fine, but the lab results will be back in about a week. Gyno, check!

And finally, I had to see a dermatologist for a “full body scan” to make sure no skin cancer was lurking or starting amazon cd kaufen mp3 herunterladen. It is a good thing to do anyway, but also good after radiation to check the skin around the area that was exposed. The doctor looked me over head to toe and said all looked good. Dermatologist, check!

It was a tiring, busy end to the year but a necessary one so I can jump into 2017 with just a few months left at Sloan. I can concentrate on getting through the rest of my breast cancer treatments and not have to worry about anything else for a while tasten handy herunterladen.

So as your own 2016 is wrapping up, please make sure to take the time to make your annual appointments and get your screenings done. No one is immune to having their life hijacked by a deadly disease and as with anything, the sooner you catch it, the easier it is to get through it and kick it.

After all, as you’re sitting there wrapping those new sweaters, video games, bottles of booze and the “shoot, I didn’t know they were coming” extra candles, remember, the best gift you can give your family and friends – is you income tax return 2017.

Merry Christmas everyone and I wish you all a healthy, Happy New Year!

THANKS FOR GIVING…

Hi all,

Happy Thanksgiving! Hope you are enjoying being around family and friends and counting your blessings as you over stuff yourself with turkey and all the trimmings logic for free.

And since this is a time of giving thanks, I wanted to use this day and space to say a heartfelt thank you to all of you who have helped me along on my journey youtube wiedergabelisten downloaden.  There is no way to name everyone and everything that was done for me,  but you know who you are and what you did. Somehow saying “thank you” doesn’t seem like enough, but until I see all of you in person, I hope this message gets to you and you know how grateful I am for having you in my corner 3d passed download.

Since the very first day I started treatment, the outpouring of love and support was overwhelming. Calls, cards, texts, emails, blog posts and Facebook mentions continued to roll in for months and months download mahjong game.

Some of you sent flowers, a plant, or snack and wine baskets. Others had local restaurants deliver food when shopping or cooking was too much. There were deliveries of chocolates from a local chocolatier who doesn’t normally deliver, but who had lost loved ones to cancer, so they made an exception and always handed me that special box with a warm, understanding smile candy crush soda saga.
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There were so many gifts like books, healing crystals and oils, adult coloring books, a beautiful angel figurine, a Christmas ornament, bracelets with special meanings or special energy, personalized t-shirts, a beautiful homemade quilt, a homemade fleece blanket,  Red Sox gear, various hats, money, cupcakes, cookies, fun and inspiring magnets, lotions, the much needed Starbuck’s and Dunkin Donuts gift cards, a fun measuring spoon, candy tins, DVD’s, a puzzle, get well drawings from your kids, a spa gift card and a FitBit for when I feel well enough to get back into working out excel formeln herunterladen.

And each time something showed up it was a huge mood booster and it felt like a big hug coming in so many different forms.

Then there were those of you who called asking about doing a fundraiser, or had me backstage after a show for a hug, high five and eyelash check, or who posted on your own blog inspiring messages from your followers so I could see them free video download youtube. There are those of you who came to chemo even though it meant spending hours at the facility, or drove to NJ to help out or just visit.  And you prayed for me, included me in prayer chains and sent only positive energy. You called to offer a pep talk, just at the right time or sent me inspiring memes over the internet or lightened my load at work when I was in the thick of it. These things I will never forget as I continue on this wild ride of fighting every day to stay healthy.

So on all days, but especially on Thanksgiving, I would like to say to all of you reading this, in whatever capacity you stood by me, in whatever way you spent a part of your own life helping me with mine, quite simply…thanks for giving.

CLEAR FOR A YEAR…

Hi all,

Thanks for the posts, emails, calls and texts checking in! Things are going well.  I’m starting to get a little energy back and trying to get back to life as usual as much as I can download ifile.

Of course, when you’re still in treatment for breast cancer, in the middle of life as usual, there’s doctor’s appointments, infusions and follow-up visits, but at least the nitty gritty of Sloan visits is winding down which has been a relief netflix filme auf tableten.

I recently just had two of those follow-up visits. One was with my radiation oncologist and the other with my surgeon after my yearly mammogram auf soundclouden.

The radiation oncologist checked everything over and talked about any issues I was having. He said everything looked great and then said, “Well, unless you need us for anything, we’ll see you in a year.”

Then a few days later I had my mammogram and surgeon follow-up appointment apple music download all songs. The mammogram was a little nerve wracking as you can imagine. They have you wait in the waiting room for someone to come out and either tell you they need more images, or that everything looked ok herunterladen. It was taking awhile for them to come out for me, but finally the technician did. She brought me back to another room and told me all was clear and everything looked great bildbearbeitungsprogramm jpg kostenlos downloaden.

I then went up to meet with my surgeon. At first the nurse came in to check everything and asked some questions about how I was doing. Then my surgeon came in and she also checked me über mobile netzwerk herunterladen. She pushed and pulled and stood back to make sure there was no swelling or anything looked unusual. She then said everything looked great and that she’d see me in a year Download phototan app!
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Before I left I asked her what I should be looking for or what I should be doing through the year. She said with a smile, “Enjoying it.”

I walked out of there breathing a huge sigh of relief, but I’m also a little nervous because for the past year, every couple of weeks I had a doctor examining me and making sure things were going ok. Now, I’m on my own for the most part. I’ll be checking myself over, but it’s not the same as having all those highly skilled Sloan Kettering cancer doctor’s hands on you constantly.

So what’s left? Well, I’m still doing the antibody infusions every three weeks. Since I was HER2 positive, we need to block that receptor from growing. I started these in April when I was doing the Taxol chemo and the treatment is for a year, so I’ll be done with them in April of 2017.

I’m also on Tamoxifen which I will be on for 10 years. It’s a daily pill to block estrogen since my breast cancer was also estrogen positive. I may get switched over to another pill down the line, but for now this is the one I’m on. It is wreaking havoc on my sleep because it is causing super painful muscle cramping and charley horses which keep waking me up. And it’s also giving me pretty intense hot flashes and night sweats. I have named it my newborn, Tamoxifen Cote! Kind of dragging me down, but I’m now getting acupuncture to try to help with those side effects and doing all the tips and tricks I can to stop the cramping. Hopefully it subsides the longer I’m on it, we will see.

But for now, I will take it one day at a time, get back into as much of a regular, daily routine as I can and keep doing self exams.

And I will most definitely, and most importantly, enjoy being clear for a year.

SHE CRIED…

Hey everyone!

Thanks for all the check-ins and continued thoughts and prayers, I really appreciate it. After 6 very long weeks, I’m done with radiation thankfully and it is such a relief to not have to go there every night after work.

A lot of you are asking what’s next. Well, I’m still in treatment and will be until around April. I’m currently going every 3 weeks to Sloan for my antibody infusions of Herceptin and Pertuzamab to target the HER2 gene and am taking a daily med called Tamoxifen which blocks estrogen in the breast tissue movies to download netflix. Since my breast cancer was HER2 positive and estrogen positive, these two forms of treatment are necessary to help prevent a recurrence.  They all come with their own side effects, which I’m dealing with on a daily basis, but as annoying and sometimes debilitating as they are, they definitely beat the alternative.

Now that I have some time to breathe I’m able to think back on everything that I’ve been through in the past year and where I’m at now citrix receiver download kostenlos.  One thing that sticks out in my mind is an email exchange with one of my good friends, Catherine when I was first diagnosed. Catherine and I have known each other since the 90’s and have always said we are forever tied to each other by the OJ Simpson verdict. We were working at the same company and sitting in the car together listening to the radio when the verdict came in. Every time I see anything about that case, it reminds me of her and that day download multiple files chrome.

Catherine was diagnosed with breast cancer in October of 2001 and had been through the full range of treatment. We hadn’t seen each other in forever, her life busy with three kids and a career, mine with the rat race of NYC.  But we remained connected on Facebook and I was about to let everyone know online about my diagnosis and I didn’t want her to see it there without first telling her personally Download hex editor for free.

I emailed her: “So, you know how we will always have the OJ Simpson verdict in common? Unfortunately we now have something else. I was just diagnosed with breast cancer.”

She wrote back, “I will call you as soon as I stop crying.”

I told her not to cry, that I was ok and will be fine, that I was in good spirits and ready to get started with treatment.

The Robert brothers, who worked closely with Charles, invented the methodology which was the construction of the bridge was also coordinated and supported by the viagra online delivery Clearwater Constructors of Colorado kostenlos bücher downloaden für ipad. Heart disease, liver problems, kidney failures, diabetes cheapest viagra uk and cancer are all known as a few common conditions that are caused due to the abrupt forward, backward, or sideways movements of the head during accidents. In such situations, where you are not able to get erection in a natural pfizer viagra australia way herunterladen. If you http://www.icks.org/data/ijks/1482965794_add_file_4.pdf cialis online have any doubts regarding its credibility and authenticity, you should know that it is the 42nd largest publicly traded company in the world. And now I sit here, a year out from when I first got my mammogram that showed “an area of concern.”  Many of you have followed my blog from the beginning and know a lot of what I’ve been through herunterladen. But there is no way to tell you everything that fighting breast cancer entails. The only way you know can really know how all encompassing it is in your life is if you have personally gone through it.  I honestly pray none of you have to which is why right after I say hello, I ask if you’ve had your mammogram.

And while I look back at what I’ve been through in the past year, I’m also trying to look forward download fortnite update faster. I have my follow-up appointment with my surgeon on October 31st and will get my next mammogram then as well. The 3 weeks in between the antibody infusions gives me a little bit of normalcy. I’m starting to get back into exercising and life as it used to be is slowly coming back into focus.

But I’m also constantly reminded of my diagnosis neverwinter herunterladen. The scars are there, physically, mentally and emotionally and from what I am learning, always will be. The thought of a recurrence occasionally creeps in when you least expect it. There are the “what ifs” you have to talk yourself out of. And now that it’s October and Breast Cancer Awareness Month it’s hard not to think about it download whatsapp new smileys. Between the barrage of social media posts, pink ribbons, commercials, bright pink NFL attire, articles about new treatments, research, fundraising and discussions on how many women are still dying from breast cancer every year, even if I wanted to mentally step away from it, it’s impossible right now.

I know what it takes to fight breast cancer. I know the fear, the physical limitations of the human body that get pushed to the very brink during treatment, to be your own biggest cheerleader in your quietest, darkest moments, to remain hopeful and grateful for every breath and day you are still here.

I used to be like most people during the month of October. I’d see the fundraising races on the news, the masses of badasses running with their survivor sashes and bald heads. I knew they had been through something, but I didn’t know the level of human spirit and strength they needed to get there.

From this day forward when I hear someone has been through breast cancer treatment, or has been diagnosed, my heart will ache for them, for what they have gone through, or will need to go through. I know they will do what they have to do to get through it and come out the other side, whatever other side that is.

I think back to that first email I sent to Catherine and her immediate response back.

And now I know why she cried.

EASY…

Hey everyone!

Well to sum it up, this every day after work thing with radiation treatment certainly takes up a lot of time! Thank you for all the texts, Facebook posts and emails with all your support, they mean a lot and help me get through the long days.

Some of you have asked me about radiation and how different it is from chemo, if there are side effects, what goes into it, how my skin is doing, etc. Here’s a bit of what it entails…

Right now I am a little over midway through it.  I have 30 treatments, or 6 weeks of radiation. I am finished with week 4 and have 12 treatments left.  Two days are added into a 7th week because one day on my first week I had a “dress rehearsal” with no actual radiation and then another night after trekking all the way over there, the treatments that night had to be cancelled because the computer system that “tracks the breath hold” was down herunterladen. They tried to get it back up while we were there, but then it was taking too long so they told all the patients who were left for the night to go home.

So as of right now, by mid-September I will be done with radiation.

At the same time as a couple of my radiation appointments, I also have my antibody infusion at a different Sloan building. It definitely makes for a very long day.  The last time I had to do them back to back, I started with the infusion at 2pm to check-in. You have to check in an hour earlier than your appointment time because the pharmacist won’t mix one of the meds until you show up. So already there is an hour built in to wait.

Then my 3pm infusion time was really delayed, so I got into a suite around 5pm.  By the time they confirm who I am, find a good vein, get the IV in and another nurse comes in to cross-check that the meds are correct and for me (they are super careful at Sloan which is great) another 20-30 minutes goes by java 7 herunterladen.  Then each antibody takes 30 minutes to drip after the nurse switches them out. So there are a lot of variables as to why it takes the time it does. But getting in so late was stressful because I had to be at my radiation appointment a couple blocks away at 6:45pm.  And my plan to eat in between appointments went out the window since I didn’t get out of my infusion suite until abut 6:30pm.  One definition of irony – when your doctors tell you to keep your stress level down, but then the health facility you’re at to get well is what stresses you out.

Anyway, while I was getting my last infusion, the nurse was smacking at my veins and trying to get one to wake up enough to get an IV in. We were chatting about chemo and the antibodies and I told her i was a little stressed about time since I had to leave as soon as we were done to go over for radiation.

She then said “Well, at least that’s easy.”

I was sort of taken aback by her comment because as she said it I was trying desperately not to scratch my red, irritated itchy chest while simultaneously dreading sitting around in that waiting room and then the trek back through the city before getting on a packed, hot subway ride that would hopefully get me home before 9pm herunterladen.

I replied, “Well, I wouldn’t say it’s easy. For one it’s every single day after work, the table is hard as a rock and cold steel and…”

She cut me off and said, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I just meant that I have had patients tell me it is easy compared to chemo.”

For some, this acquisition de viagra is a very embarrassing situation and why not? Women will not be satisfied and it can put great strain on the relationship of a couple. What you online cialis have to be careful about though is that the site you order from be safe as far as payment gateways are concerned. The medicine is cialis tablets online easy to use as it involves an insertion of a small group of islet cells in the liver citrix workspace app herunterladen. What is the common dosage of kamagra for male impotence? The dosage of Kamagra or kamagra jelly depends on your condition and your health. the best viagra I told her, “It definitely is, yes. Radiation is easier, but it’s not easy.”

I know what she meant, and I tried to make her not feel bad for saying it, which I think she did.  Plus, she was holding the IV needle about to poke the only vein that’s been usable in the past few weeks, so I wanted her to concentrate on that and not about saying something stupid to a patient.

But it got me thinking about this whole process. For me, radiation is definitely nowhere near as hard to handle as chemo but it does have its side effects calendar download excel for free. I’m pretty tired now after 4 weeks of running around and the actual radiation that causes fatigue.  I go every day after work (some go before) which takes about 30-40 minutes to get there. It entails rushing to the train, waiting for another train if you miss it, then hiking across the city for 20 minutes each way,  waiting after checking in – sometimes an hour or two to get seen – putting lotion on 2-4 times a day, going in earlier one day a week for a checkup with my radiation oncologist and forcing myself not to scratch incredibly itchy patches of irritated skin every minute of the day, etc.

And as for the treatment itself, here’s how it works. You check in at the front desk and wait for your name to be called. When it is, you grab a key, go into a small locker room, put your belongings in a locker and change into a hospital gown.  You then go into another waiting room until the radiation therapist comes to get you. Then you go into a cold room and get on a hard, steel table. Your arms go up into stirrups and you take down the hospital gown so your breast is exposed to the radiation beams and also whoever the radiation therapists are that night geogebra version 5 herunterladen. I have a team of 4 therapists, but sometimes they have other people covering for them.  Some are male, some are female. It’s a hospital setting so you know they have seen it all, but it still takes a little getting used to. They take a Sharpie, mark your tattoo spots a little better and then line you up perfectly on the table where you have to try to remain in position as much as possible.  They have you lined up to the millimeter.

The therapist then steps out of the room and talks to you through an intercom, coaching you on the breath technique. If your breast cancer was on your left side, you hold your breath until the radiation stops. This moves your heart out of the way of the radiation beam fritz fon c5 ringtones. They don’t want it to hit anything other than the breast tissue it is targeting. Then the machine moves to another position and you start over again. I do this four times, since they are hitting four different areas. The actual radiation part on the table typically takes about 15-20 minutes most nights. On one random night a week they have to take additional images to make sure you’re still lined up right and everything looks good.  So that night is about 40 minutes on the table.

To put it in perspective, one woman I have been sitting around with in the waiting room most nights said she’d take another month of chemo over the grind of daily radiation navi software autoradio sd map.  I almost got nauseous just hearing her say that.  I wouldn’t go that far – but that should give you an indication of how not easy radiation is.

Over the weekend the concept of what’s easy came up again. I was chatting with one of my best friends from college.  She goes for her mammograms regularly and I told her to make sure she also asks for an ultrasound.  I didn’t know this before but often mammograms can miss breast cancer, especially in women with dense breast tissue.  I know two people now who had clear mammograms, but later on an ultrasound showed a tumor.  It is not a one size fits all disease. It comes in all different shapes and sizes, different markers, different treatments needed to kill it, different types of tumors and different levels and stages solitaire download windows 7 kostenlos. So if you are going for your mammogram, fight for an ultrasound too.

She said she does get ultrasounds, but “it’s a pain” because you have to then wait another 20 minutes or more after getting your mammogram, then get the ultrasound and it drags out the appointment that much longer.  You probably know where I’m going with this.

As many of you have been following this blog from the beginning, you have seen most of what it takes to fight breast cancer and I’m sure have pretty much gathered at this point that no part of it is easy. That is a big reason why I’m sharing the experience here, to help you understand why it’s so important to get your mammograms and also do your self exams.  The earlier you catch something, the easier it is to fight it.

I know women who had a lumpectomy and that’s it. No chemo, no radiation, just medication after download pdf edit.  Another friend had a lumpectomy and 4 weeks of radiation. If you catch it at Stage 0 and it hasn’t yet spread you have a lot less work ahead of you. In Stage 0 the “abnormal cells” haven’t left the milk duct, therefore no lymph nodes need to be removed which makes surgery and recovery that much easier.  If you remember, I had four nodes removed and one was positive, which moved me into Stage 2 and the fear that cancer cells could have moved into the rest of my body. Another woman I am friendly with now at Sloan had 12 lymph nodes removed and has to do occupational therapy weekly to help straighten her arm all the way.  So again, early detection is the key to not just an easier time fighting it, but also a better chance of survival.

So to those of you reading this who have yet to get their mammogram scheduled or don’t want to add an ultrasound or forget to do self exams because you “just don’t have the time” right now or can’t remember to do it…I get it. I was you. I know finding time to sit on hold to make the appointment, getting in the car or on the train to get to the facility, taking the morning or a whole day off from work and possibly missing one of your kid’s events to do it can seem like a major pain in the ass and too time consuming.

But trust me when I tell you, compared to what you have to go through if you let a tumor sit in there to grow – the mammogram/ultrasound part is the only part of this whole process that’s easy.

SAYING NO…

Hello all,

Sorry for the delay, been sorting out life without chemo and enjoying the break before my Herceptin/Perjeta infusion this Friday and the start of radiation on August 1.  Radiation will be every day, Mon-Fri until the middle of September. That nap I keep saying I need?  I may be more like a bear hibernating at the end of it all Download games for free full version german windows 10 offline.  🙂

I have to say though, not having to get chemo anymore is a great feeling. When I got my last Taxol infusion on July 8th, it was a huge mental mountain I had gotten to the top of.  It’s an odd feeling when you know you don’t have to endure those chemicals anymore. As much as they are needed to kill off any cancer cells that may have been hiding in my system, and I’m grateful to have had all the chemo to attack them, to know you don’t have to subject your body to those chemicals again is a big relief download stranger things.  And to not have to deal with the side effects of those chemicals is an even better feeling.

But even though mentally I’m past the chemo, I had to realize, sometimes the hard way, that physically I’m not there yet.  Just because the last of the Taxol dripped into my veins  about 3 weeks ago doesn’t mean my body is in synch with my mind in recovery. According to my badasses who have come before me, it is going to take a few months before I’ve got my stamina and energy back close to 100% office downloaden gratis.

Which leads me to the reason for this blog and one word that I have had to use more in these past 7 months of treatment than I think I’ve used in my entire life.

“NO.”

During this entire process, from diagnosis to now, there have been things people have asked me to do and I had to say no because there was no other choice and it was physically impossible to do them.  Those days when I was flat out on the couch and even answering a phone call would take too much energy you can download facebook videos. Or when going out for a quick lunch would have wiped me out for the rest of the day, or when someone wanted to visit and it meant putting on a smile and the wig for hours longer than I had in me.

And at times I even had to say no to myself. Like when I wanted to try to squeeze in an errand before going into work, but didn’t because I knew it meant being run down by the end of the night wrestling musik kostenlos downloaden. Or the long walk I wanted to try when it was way too hot and muggy. Or thinking just maybe I could work until 1am with the rest of my show team or hang on at the end of a 6 day work week for another 12 hour day when the rug got pulled out from under us by breaking news.

I have to constantly remind myself that my immune system is not where it needs to be and to pull back because doing too much could very easily make me sick or land me back in the hospital memoji stickers.  It can be frustrating, but it’s necessary to keep a balance in order to continue to get well.
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And honestly, saying no when you have all those physical limitations is easy. But saying no when you just don’t want to do something, or someone asks you to put their needs over your own is a lot harder. There are thousands of articles from psychologists and spiritual gurus who all share their input on why it is so hard to do.

But here’s what I have learned in the past few months herunterladen. When you are diagnosed with a life threatening illness and you have gone through the process of actually fighting for your life, saying no becomes a lot easier. There is now an immense spiritual power in it.

In the past, I felt like I had to explain why I couldn’t do something. As if just not wanting to do it wasn’t a good enough reason java 32 bit kostenlos downloaden. Almost like I had to have something else going on at the same time and it gave me a reason why I couldn’t do it. I’m sure you all feel the same way sometimes. As if you owe an explanation as to why you can’t do something. I have been there.

Now, I just say no.  And here’s what makes it easy for me.  When faced with a breast cancer diagnosis, you learn very quickly that no one is promised a full, long life.  It now becomes clearer than ever that you don’t know how much time you have here on Earth.  And when you beat it through surgery, chemo and radiation, you live the rest of your life wondering, but never knowing, if it will come back.

So every second, every minute and every hour of the day you want to spend doing what you want to be doing. Doing what makes you happy and what honors your own soul.  Wasting time doing things you don’t want to do is simply not an option anymore.  I am now more than ever aware of time and the inevitable lack thereof.

So please, don’t wait for a life altering event or diagnosis to take inventory of your own daily life. Notice how many times you say yes to something when you really want to say no. How many times do you put the needs of someone else over your own?  What are you doing that is taking time away from what you really want to be doing?

None of us knows how long we will have here in our one lifetime. Don’t give up any more of what makes you happy and gives you joy by doing things you don’t want to do.

In other words…start saying yes…to saying no.

IYANLA NO